Shame, beating heart-beating drum
I noticed my mind was busy today, with lots of thoughts a solutions arising as I tried to watch what was happening inside. I noticed a feeling of shame coming up. It felt sharp and familiar. I saw the crow come and wrap its wings around my heart, holding the shame.
As busy thoughts and not much else unfolded, I started to feel the drum beat I was listening to penetrate first my heart, then my back and other parts of my body. It pulsed and beat at, creating subtle movement. The feeling the beating generated was relief.
I was reminded by my busy thoughts of my teacher telling me that shamanic experience is marked by its dynamic motion. Sitting still, quietly is not shamanic experience. I looked for the body (not mind) movement as I sat.
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